Bedtime Revamped
Wednesday, February 9, 2011 by Amy
Night Two of our new bedtime strategy and the girls have slept in their rooms for two nights in a row. No night-waking, so fussing, no nothing.
I have always read a lot to the girls at nighttime. In fact, I read them to sleep. I came to the realization that this was not helpful. It prolonged bedtime and having them fall asleep that way wasn't helping them to learn to sleep on their own. I moved story time to the living room, so it is a pre-bedtime ritual, not a bedtime ritual. So far so good. The television, obviously, is off during this time (Rudi can just deal with it for 30 minutes LOL). They get into their pajamas, have sleepytime tea, and we read some Harry Potter, and some James and the Giant Peach.
Then, the girls brush their teeth and we go upstairs. So far, they have chosen to sleep in the same bed. I tuck them in, give them a kiss, and leave promising to come check on them in 5 minutes. No lingering, not coddling, just tuck-in, kiss, and leave. But I actually come back up in 5 minutes to check on them. The first night, they were asleep before my first check-in, and last night, they were asleep between the first and second check-in. Eventually I will prolong the 5 minutes
Now, here's the bribery part. If they stay upstairs the whole night, they get two quarters in the morning. If they feel the undeniable need to come downstairs in the night, they are to bring their sleeping bags and pillows and sleep on our bedroom floor. If that happens, they get one quarter, providing they did not wake me up in the process. Now, I know bribery isn't a particularly effective way of parenting, but it works in this scenario so far because it provides a little bit of differentiation between the desirable outcome (sleeping in their own beds) and the slightly less desirable outcome (sleeping on our bedroom floor). Also, them knowing that they can come downstairs if they must, provides some comfort for them, knowing that they have options. So far they haven't chosen that option, but the option simply being there helps them.
Avery is notorious for throwing fits and being generally very disagreeable at night. That's now she's always been. Kicking and screaming in the bed, demanding this and demanding that. Well, she hasn't done this at all since our new routine.
Yes, I know it takes at least 21 days to establish a new routine, and I'm sure it will need to be tweaked somewhere down the line, but so far so good!!
I have always read a lot to the girls at nighttime. In fact, I read them to sleep. I came to the realization that this was not helpful. It prolonged bedtime and having them fall asleep that way wasn't helping them to learn to sleep on their own. I moved story time to the living room, so it is a pre-bedtime ritual, not a bedtime ritual. So far so good. The television, obviously, is off during this time (Rudi can just deal with it for 30 minutes LOL). They get into their pajamas, have sleepytime tea, and we read some Harry Potter, and some James and the Giant Peach.
Then, the girls brush their teeth and we go upstairs. So far, they have chosen to sleep in the same bed. I tuck them in, give them a kiss, and leave promising to come check on them in 5 minutes. No lingering, not coddling, just tuck-in, kiss, and leave. But I actually come back up in 5 minutes to check on them. The first night, they were asleep before my first check-in, and last night, they were asleep between the first and second check-in. Eventually I will prolong the 5 minutes
Now, here's the bribery part. If they stay upstairs the whole night, they get two quarters in the morning. If they feel the undeniable need to come downstairs in the night, they are to bring their sleeping bags and pillows and sleep on our bedroom floor. If that happens, they get one quarter, providing they did not wake me up in the process. Now, I know bribery isn't a particularly effective way of parenting, but it works in this scenario so far because it provides a little bit of differentiation between the desirable outcome (sleeping in their own beds) and the slightly less desirable outcome (sleeping on our bedroom floor). Also, them knowing that they can come downstairs if they must, provides some comfort for them, knowing that they have options. So far they haven't chosen that option, but the option simply being there helps them.
Avery is notorious for throwing fits and being generally very disagreeable at night. That's now she's always been. Kicking and screaming in the bed, demanding this and demanding that. Well, she hasn't done this at all since our new routine.
Yes, I know it takes at least 21 days to establish a new routine, and I'm sure it will need to be tweaked somewhere down the line, but so far so good!!
